“Sometimes the desert starts to bloom”
“It happened seven years ago, and I’ve never told anybody until today…” That’s how people typically bring up the subject of sexual abuse or sexual assault.
You too may think of it as a shameful secret you’ve never been able to talk about.
When you tried to shut down the memory of what happened to you, all the terrible feelings of shame and victimization and violation went underground. You may wonder why you have such a hard time with relationships, or why people always take advantage of you, or why you always seem to be numbing out, or why you feel so unworthy, or why you struggle with addictions.
Or you may be dealing with other issues that don’t seem to be connected with what happened to you, but probably are.
Sexual victimization can teach you that you are dirty and unlovable, that you are there to be used by others, that what happens to you doesn’t matter, but what it teaches you is a lie.
What did it teach you? When you get in touch with what happened to you, when you allow yourself to feel that deep pain, what was the lie you took away from that experience?
I can help you look at what you told yourself then, and still tell yourself now, and how it affects your life today. I can help you expose that lie.
I can’t undo what happened to you. But I can help you put it in the past, where it belongs. I can help you remember what happened without reliving it. I can help you replace the lies you’ve been telling yourself with loving messages of affirmation. Even if you feel your life has become a desert devoid of life, know there is hope.
Know that, as the great therapist Fritz Perls wrote, “sometimes the desert starts to bloom.”